Do you rush through working a JYN?


Do you tend to rush through the process of working a JYN (Judge Your Neighbour Worksheet) and try doing it in your head?

When you do that, do you have trouble finding the turnarounds?

Getting still in question three

From my experience, I notice that the turnarounds fall out of my work when I fully sit in answering the four questions.  When I sit in the moment where I felt the most emotion and from that place answer Question 3 – How do you react, what happens when you believe that thought? I notice when I am connected with what I was feeling, my answers come easily.

Meditating on question four

Going to Question 4 – Who would you be without the thought, is then a process of getting still and noticing. Sitting in my response to question four allows me to become still and notice all of the things that change for me when I am not there with the thought.

Being in that place, without the thought the response to the Turnarounds then naturally come for me.  I can find the first turnaround easily, as one of them seems the most natural next step in my inquiry.  Then the others show themselves from there.

Follow the simple directions

What I noticed works best for me, is to follow the simple directions and ‘Do The Work’ answering the four questions first.

Shortcutting the process by either jumping straight to the Turnarounds or rushing through working the statements is of little value. Not taking the time to meditate on the statements, I noticed I feel as though I have short changed myself.  I’ve

Slow down and take your time to meditate on the Judge Your Neighbour worksheet.  Do The Work on all or many of the statements on your worksheet.  I found peace when I do that.

Do you have extreme emotional reactions?

Snowballing emotional reactions to situations from Karen Munro on Vimeo.

When you notice yourself responding to a situation with an extreme emotional reaction slow down and consider if you’ve had a snowballing effect occur.

What do I mean by a ‘snowballing effect’?

It is my way of describing when you have an extreme emotional reaction to something, that  started some time back. It was triggered when you first felt the emotion.

Let me explain what I mean with an example. An hour before the incident in which you reacted in with an extreme emotional reaction something small occurred that you reacted to.  Your angry was triggered when something wasn’t done the way you expected it to be.  This is incident number one.  Here your emotional snowball is very small.

Then half an hour afterwards, you knocked something and broke it. Your anger in that moment was a little more intense.  The original situations emotion was built on and so your anger snowball got bigger.

When the third incident occurred, you receive a phone call tell you that you have to complete a task and it feels as though the time frame is too short for you, your anger erupts.  You might yell at the person on the phone in an extreme way, much more than you would if you reacted without the others triggers occurring.  You feel extreme intense emotion in that moment.

This is what I mean by the snowballing effect.  The first incident was the equivalent of a small pea size snowball of emotion.  The second incident had that snowball become the size of a tennis ball of emotion.  The third incident grew the size of that snowball to be a basket ball of emotion.  If you continue to build on your emotion, in my example anger without looking at it, then your snowball will be the size of a house before you know it.

Question your thinking from your first reaction

This is why it is valuable to notice at the first situation that you had an emotional reaction. It’s at that point that you can do something about it by questioning your thinking.  This will stop the snowball effect.  When the second incident occurs, whilst you might react it will not be in such an extreme way.

And, if you notice that you’re not able to stop and look at the first situation when it occurs, and you react at the second situation, then it’s still a good time to go back and consider that there may be two separate situations to look at and inquire into.


You’re most difficult relationship, which one is it?

most difficult relationship

Which is the most difficult relationship in your life right now? Is there one relationship that you feel isn’t working? There’s disconnection and a feeling of un-love. It’s the one relationship that feels as though it impacts on your ability to be happy with your life. And whilst it might…

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